By Harriet Lerner — 2020
These three rules for voicing your criticisms are game changers.
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This story is about a mom and a step-dad who had argued a lot over a teenage daughter who was rude and home and unwilling to do her part. The step-dad shifted to using a non-defensive statement and got very different results.
This story is about a situation where Todd, a husband, almost left his wife and kids, and the wife found a way to ask one non-defensive question that led to a conversation that saved the marriage.
People in your life can make you feel bad or wrong by saying one thing to you and meaning something else. You can avoid falling into their traps.
The best apologies are short, and don’t go on to include explanations that run the risk of undoing them. An apology isn’t the only chance you ever get to address the underlying issue. The apology is the chance you get to establish the ground for future communication.
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Spiteful words can hurt your feelings but silence breaks your heart.
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It's no secret that emotional intelligence plays a crucial role in your relationships. But how do you apply these specialized skills in everyday life? It's easy--with this practical, ready-to-use guide by a renowned expert in the field of emotional intelligence and communication.
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Want communications in your relationship to be more effective? Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman explains the best (and worst) ways to talk to your mate about your wishes and needs.
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You've approached your partner in a gentle manner, to bring up an issue you want to discuss (called a "softened startup"). What if you get negative response? Listen to Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman explain how to work around this.
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