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If anyone tells you that a certain person speaks ill of you, do not make excuses about what is said of you but answer, ‘He was ignorant of my other faults, else he would not have mentioned these alone.’

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Epictetus (50–135 CE) was a Greek Stoic philosopher who believed that philosophy was a way of life and not just a theoretical discipline. He taught that all external events are beyond one’s control, and thus one should accept whatever happens calmly and dispassionately. In addition, Epictetus believed in individual responsibility for one’s actions through rigorous self-discipline.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageAvoidance will make you feel less vulnerable in the short run, but it will never make you less afraid.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageIf you love deeply, you’re going to get hurt badly. But it’s still worth it.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageWe meet no ordinary people in our lives.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageStay a verb—don’t become a noun.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageLife’s work is to wake up, to let the things that enter into the circle wake you up rather than put you to sleep. The only way to do this is to open, be curious, and develop some sense of sympathy for everything that comes along, to get to know its nature and let it teach you what it will.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageEmpathetic listening is an awesome medication for the hurting heart.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageIf only our passion to understand others were as great as our passion to be understood. Were this so, all our apologies would be truly meaningful and healing.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageWhen forgiveness experts talk in binary language (’You either forgive the wrongdoer or you are a prisoner of your own anger and hate’), they are collapsing the messy complexity of human emotions into a simplistic dichotomous equation.

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FindCenter Quotes ImagePeople’s sense of self-worth is pivotal to their ability to look clearly at the hurt they’ve caused. The more solid one’s sense of self regard, the more likely that that person can feel empathy and compassion for the hurt party, and apologize from an authentic center.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageWhen we take rejection as proof of our inadequacies, it’s hard to allow ourselves to risk being truly seen again. . . . The problem arises when shame kicks in and we aren’t able to view our flaws, limitations, and vulnerabilities in a patient, self-loving way.

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