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There is nothing that can replace the absence of someone dear to us, and one should not even attempt to do so. One must simply hold out and endure it. At first that sounds very hard, but at the same time it is also a great comfort. For to the extent the emptiness truly remains unfilled one remains connected to the other person through it. It is wrong to say that God fills the emptiness. God in no way fills it but much more leaves it precisely unfilled and thus helps us preserve—even in pain—the authentic relationship. Further more, the more beautiful and full the remembrances, the more difficult the separation. But gratitude transforms the torment of memory into silent joy. One bears what was lovely in the past not as a thorn but as a precious gift deep within, a hidden treasure of which one can always be certain.

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Dietrich Bonhoeffer (1906–1945) was a German Lutheran theologian, anti-Nazi dissident, and founding member of the Confessing Church. His writings on Christianity’s role in the secular world are widely known and influential. He was also known for his staunch resistance to the Nazi dictatorship, for which he spent time in a concentration camp and was eventually hanged.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageThe death of a beloved is an amputation.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageDo not waste time bothering whether you ‘love’ your neighbor; act as if you did. As soon as we do this we find one of the great secrets. When you are behaving as if you loved someone, you will presently come to love him.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageThe ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageNo matter how simplified or complicated life gets, it can make us miserable or it can wake us up.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageThe miracle is that your children will love you with all your imperfections if you can do the same for them.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageAvoidance will make you feel less vulnerable in the short run, but it will never make you less afraid.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageHe who cannot reveal himself cannot love, and he who cannot love is the most unhappy man of all.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageThe major problem of life is learning how to handle the costly interruptions. The door that slams shut, the plan that got sidetracked, the marriage that failed. Or that lovely poem that didn’t get written because someone knocked on the door.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageHow ironic that the difficult times we fear might ruin us are the very ones that can break us open and help us blossom into who we were meant to be.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageAffection is responsible for nine-tenths of whatever solid and durable happiness there is in our natural lives.

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Death and Dying