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There is nothing that can replace the absence of someone dear to us, and one should not even attempt to do so. One must simply hold out and endure it. At first that sounds very hard, but at the same time it is also a great comfort. For to the extent the emptiness truly remains unfilled one remains connected to the other person through it. It is wrong to say that God fills the emptiness. God in no way fills it but much more leaves it precisely unfilled and thus helps us preserve—even in pain—the authentic relationship. Further more, the more beautiful and full the remembrances, the more difficult the separation. But gratitude transforms the torment of memory into silent joy. One bears what was lovely in the past not as a thorn but as a precious gift deep within, a hidden treasure of which one can always be certain.

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Dietrich Bonhoeffer (1906–1945) was a German Lutheran theologian, anti-Nazi dissident, and founding member of the Confessing Church. His writings on Christianity’s role in the secular world are widely known and influential. He was also known for his staunch resistance to the Nazi dictatorship, for which he spent time in a concentration camp and was eventually hanged.

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FindCenter Quotes ImageHow ironic that the difficult times we fear might ruin us are the very ones that can break us open and help us blossom into who we were meant to be.

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Death and Dying