By Melanie Curtin — 2018
If the answers are no, there’s likely going to be a problem.
Read on www.inc.com
CLEAR ALL
The way you approach a hard conversation either reinforces a pathway for exchange or erodes trust in the relationship. You can set yourself up for a more productive, less volatile exchange by being clear about what you are trying to accomplish by treading into challenging terrain.
1
A hard conversation is about trying to sort of understand more focus on descriptions and sharing experience but not wrapping it all up neatly at the end because when you try to do that, you’re sort of pushing through what actually is the hard thing
2
We’ve forgotten how to talk to people. . .Our entire social lives have become a middle school dance: unrealistic expectations in the lead-up, self-conscious regrets in the aftermath.
It’s become more and more difficult to remain vulnerable, trusting, and open to life in this era of uncertainty, global upheaval, divorce, and disrupted family life.
My relative had asked for my opinion, but when I gave it, he launched into what sounded like a well-rehearsed argument, taking issue with each thing I had said and critiquing my character. I felt like I’d walked into a trap.
Communication problems are the number one reason couples split up, with 65% of couples citing this issue as the primary cause of divorce, according to a 2013 survey.
5
When we read the news, we might find ourselves overwhelmed with “non-OK-ness,” but Sylvia Boorstein says there are ways we can work with that feeling.
It sounds simple, yet it’s more than a technique for resolving conflict. It’s a different way of understanding human motivation and behavior.
All relationships go through phases, there will be good times and challenges. When you recognize that your relationship is in a rough spot, take heart. Great relationships don’t happen by luck. There are the specific skills and actions that strengthen our relationships.
4
Couples’ fights in lockdown are often about the unremitting intensity of togetherness. The sooner you de-escalate a fight, the sooner you can begin working on real solutions.