By Emily Silva Hockstra — 2020
At its heart, achieving your full potential is about being the best person that you can be. Since everyone is different, you will need to define the terms of success for yourself. Therefore, it is important to know yourself.
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Our culture has taught us that we do not have the privilege of being vulnerable like other communities.
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Sheila Rubin writes about transformance, a term used to describe “the force in the psyche that’s moving towards growth and expansion and transformation,” and the idea that healing is “not just an outcome but a process that exists within each person that emerges in conditions of safety.”
There’s an expectation of what is supposed to happen during the holidays: images of a family gathered around a tree, presents, food, love and connection as people smile at each other. But if your family is different, there sometimes can be shame.
One of the hardest aspects of being human is moving past shame. Those feelings of deep regret—and the lingering insecurity and unworthiness that most likely accompany them—stick with us in a way that can be profound.
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Many equate self-discipline with living a good, moral life, which ends up creating a lot of shame when we fail. There’s a better way to build lasting, solid self-discipline in your life.
And I am not finished with my personal work; it’s not something to be done with, but is an intrinsic part of my life. I am still learning. It’s easy to forget or only superficially acknowledge that we’re all in the same boat.