ARTICLE
Constant Complaining: Does It Serve Us?
By Toni Bernhard — 2012
One of the major sources of dissatisfaction and stress in our lives is our ongoing desire to control what happens to us—to get what we want and get rid of what we don't want. I refer to this type of desire as the state of “want, don’t-want.” How much control do we have over our circumstances? With that in mind, let’s start complaining about our lives.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
CLEAR ALL
BY TOPIC
BY TYPE
FILTER
TOPIC
- Negative Self-Talk (69)
- Self-Mastery (62)
- Self-Expression (50)
- Self-Discovery (47)
- Identity (45)
- Imagination and Creativity (40)
- Anxiety (39)
- Self-Limiting Beliefs (36)
- Depression (34)
- Self-Control (34)
- Goal Setting (33)
- Habit Formation (32)
- Honoring Emotion (31)
- Positive Self-Talk (31)
- Self-Reflection Practices (31)
- Transformation (30)
- Self-Care (27)
- Creative Well-Being (25)
- Neuroscience (25)
- BIPOC Well-Being (24)
- Communication Skills (24)
- Athlete Well-Being (23)
- Resilience (23)
- Relationship Challenges (22)
- Building Character (21)
- Motivation (20)
- Self-Acceptance (20)
- Self-Realization (20)
- Black Well-Being (19)
- Fear (19)
- Habits of Mind (19)
- Positive Thinking (19)
- Self-Esteem (19)
- Self-Healing (19)
- Stress Management (19)
- Awareness (18)
- Parenting (18)
- Confidence (17)
- Finding Meaning (17)
- Growth Mindset (17)
- Search for Purpose (17)
- Self-Actualization (17)
- Self-Compassion (17)
- Well-Being (17)
- Willpower (17)
- Authenticity (16)
- Criticism and Rejection (16)
- Spiritual Growth (16)
- Trauma Healing (16)
- Anger (15)
- Courage (15)
- Self-Love (15)
- Self-Worth (15)
- Brain Health (14)
- Emotional Intelligence (EQ) (14)
- Empowerment (14)
- Mind-Body Connection (14)
- Stress (14)
- Addiction (13)
- Entrepreneurship (13)
- Human Potential (13)
- Mindfulness (13)
- Mindfulness Practices (13)
- Self-Reckoning (13)
- Women’s Well-Being (13)
- Inner Strengths (12)
- Setting Limits and Boundaries (12)
- Shame (12)
- Child’s Emotional Growth (11)
- Failure (11)
- Focus (11)
- Identity Shifts (11)
- Inner Peace (11)
- Life Challenges (11)
- Mental Health Challenges (11)
- Physical Health (11)
- Vulnerability (11)
- Happiness (10)
- Inner Life (10)
- Intention (10)
- Meditation (10)
- Peak Performance (10)
- Psychology (10)
- Racial Identity (10)
- Self-Reliance (10)
- Speaking Your Truth (10)
- Addiction Recovery (9)
- Cancer (9)
- Children’s Well-Being (9)
- Family Dynamics (9)
- Fellowship and Community (9)
- Journaling (9)
- Manifestation (9)
- Presence (9)
- PTSD (9)
- Romantic Relationships (9)
- Anger Management (8)
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (8)
- Community Healing (8)
- Self-Pressure (8)
- Spiritual Development (8)
- Suicide (8)
- Young Adult Well-Being (8)
- Acceptance (7)
- Activism/Service (7)
- Body Image (7)
- Compassion (7)
- Dysfunctional Childhood (7)
- Grief (7)
- Joy (7)
- LGBTQIA Well-Being (7)
- Productivity (7)
- Self-Discipline (7)
- Social Justice (7)
- Spiritual Awakening (7)
- Spiritual Life (7)
- Visualization (7)
- ADD/ADHD (6)
- Breathwork (6)
- Buddhism (6)
- Chronic Anxiety (6)
- Cross-Cultural Dynamics (6)
- Decision Making (6)
- Diet and Nutrition (6)
- Exercise (6)
- Female Empowerment (6)
- Gratitude (6)
- Guilt (6)
- Integrity (6)
- Kindness (6)
- Leadership (6)
- Love (6)
- Mentoring (6)
- Moral Philosophy (6)
- Neurodiversity (6)
- Performance Anxiety (6)
- Philosophical Approaches (6)
- Racism (6)
- Trauma (6)
- Values (6)
- Yoga (6)
- Belonging (5)
- Child’s ADD/ADHD (5)
- Consciousness (5)
- Curiosity (5)
- Eating Disorders (5)
- Endurance (5)
- Inner Child (5)
- Inspiration (5)
- Letting Go (5)
- Memoir (5)
- Neuroplasticity (5)
- Perception (5)
- Positive Psychology (5)
- Racial Healing (5)
- Racial Justice (5)
- Social Psychology (5)
- Spiritual Healing (5)
- Storytelling (5)
- Unfulfilled Career (5)
- Work Relationships (5)
- Zen Meditation (5)
- Adaptability (4)
- Affirmations (4)
- Asking for Help (4)
- Conflict Resolution (4)
- Connection (4)
- Disabled Well-Being (4)
- Forgiveness (4)
- Global Challenges (4)
- Healthy Eating (4)
- Interdependence (4)
- Intimacy (4)
- Latinx Well-Being (4)
- Memory (4)
- Oneness (4)
- Passion (4)
- Problem Solving (4)
- Psychology and Spirituality (4)
- Race and Gender (4)
- Racial Discrimination (4)
- Relationship with Money (4)
- Social Responsibility (4)
- Soul Mission (4)
- Stoicism (4)
- Suffering (4)
- Tibetan Buddhism (4)
- Veteran Well-Being (4)
- Work Challenges (4)
- Work-Life Balance (4)
- Zen Buddhism (4)
- AAPI Well-Being (3)
- Access to Education (3)
- Aging (3)
- Attachment Theory (3)
- Body Positivity (3)
- Burnout (3)
- Child’s Trauma (3)
- Chronic Pain (3)
- Clinical Depression (3)
- Codependency (3)
- Competition (3)
- Connection with Nature (3)
- Disconnection (3)
- Divorce and Breakup (3)
- Doubt (3)
- Ego (3)
- Facing Own Death (3)
- Freedom (3)
- Gender Identity (3)
- Guided Meditation (3)
- Higher Calling (3)
- Immigration and Assimilation (3)
- Intergenerational Trauma (3)
- Jealousy/Envy (3)
- Loneliness (3)
- Military to Civilian Re-entry (3)
- Neuropsychology (3)
- Nonviolence (3)
- Offering Support to Others (3)
- Poetry (3)
- Ritual (3)
- Shadow (3)
- Sleep (3)
- Social Anxiety (3)
- Somatic Practices (3)
- Synchronicity (3)
- Trust (3)
- Abandonment (2)
- Accepting Love (2)
- Alcohol Addiction (2)
- Autism (2)
- Autoimmune Disease (2)
- Awe (2)
- Biofeedback (2)
- Child’s Anxiety (2)
- Child’s Autism (2)
- Child’s Challenging Behavior (2)
- Dharma (2)
- Discrimination (2)
- Ecospirituality (2)
- Embodiment (2)
- Energy Healing (2)
- Enlightenment (2)
- Faith (2)
- Family Acceptance (2)
- Fatherhood (2)
- Forest Bathing (2)
- Friendship (2)
- Generosity (2)
- Healing Approaches (2)
- Holism (2)
- Humility (2)
- Hypnosis (2)
- Imposter Syndrome (2)
- Integrative Medicine (2)
- Jungian Analysis (2)
- Learning Styles (2)
- LGBTQIA Sexuality (2)
- Masculine/Feminine Dynamics (2)
- Mindfulness Meditation (2)
- Motherhood (2)
- Neoshamanism (2)
- New Relationships (2)
- Obsessions/Compulsions (2)
- OCD (2)
- Optimism (2)
- Othering (2)
- Panic Attacks (2)
- Performance Pressure (2)
- Personality Disorders (2)
- Play (2)
- Post-Traumatic Growth (2)
- Regret (2)
- Relationship with Time (2)
- Retirement (2)
- Sexuality (2)
- Shamanic Healing (2)
- Situational Depression (2)
- Slumps (2)
- Social Presence (2)
- Spiritual Direction (2)
- Spiritual Practices (2)
- Spirituality and Health (2)
- Subconscious (2)
- Sutras (2)
- Toxic Relationships (2)
- Transgender Well-Being (2)
- Transitions (2)
- Wake-Up Calls (2)
- Weight Concerns (2)
- Work Ethic (2)
- Academic Struggles (1)
- Acupressure (1)
- Altered States (1)
- Animal Connection (1)
- Art Therapy (1)
- Building Culture (1)
- Cannabis/CBD (1)
- Challenges with Teens (1)
- Chronic Health Conditions (1)
- Collaboration (1)
- Collective Trauma (1)
- Coming Out (1)
- Comparing Belief Traditions (1)
- Conscious Evolution (1)
- Dark Night of the Soul (1)
- Death and Dying (1)
- Despair (1)
- Digital Life (1)
- Domestic Abuse (1)
- Drug Addiction (1)
- Ego Dissolution (1)
- Emotional Labor (1)
- Empathy (1)
- Energy Balancing (1)
- Environmental Justice (1)
- Fate (1)
- Generational Healing (1)
- Genetics (1)
- Goddess (1)
- Handling a Child’s Illness (1)
- Heartmath (1)
- Hero’s Journey (1)
- Highly Sensitive People (1)
- Homophobia (1)
- Hope (1)
- Incarceration (1)
- Indigenous Well-Being (1)
- Insight (Vipassana) Meditation (1)
- Internal Family Systems (1)
- Intuition (1)
- Judaism (1)
- Kids and Sports (1)
- LGBTQIA Children (1)
- LGBTQIA Parents (1)
- Living as an Empath (1)
- Living with Illness (1)
- Longevity (1)
- Lovingkindness (1)
- Managing Energy (1)
- Marriage (1)
- Men’s Well-Being (1)
- Midlife Crisis (1)
- Narcissism (1)
- Native American Beliefs (1)
- Near-Death Experience (1)
- Non-Duality (1)
- Nutritional Medicine (1)
- Patience (1)
- Personality Typing (1)
- Poverty/Economic Inequality (1)
- Prayer (1)
- Pregnancy and Childbirth (1)
- Psychedelic Journey (1)
- Psychoanalysis (1)
- Psychological Approaches (1)
- Quantum Physics (1)
- Quitting Your Job (1)
- Raising Nonbinary Children (1)
- Rest (1)
- Sacred Feminine (1)
- Saturn Return (1)
- Science and Spirituality (1)
- Self-Hypnosis (1)
- Sex (1)
- Shamanism (1)
- Smoking Addiction (1)
- Spiritual Fasting (1)
- Sustainability (1)
- The Divine (1)
- The Unconscious (1)
- Time Management (1)
- Transpersonal Psychology (1)
- Vitamin Supplementation (1)
- Western Astrology (1)
- Wholeness (1)
- Youth Activism (1)
FILTER
TEACHER
- Andrew Solomon (5)
- Daniel Amen (5)
- Lisa Feldman Barrett (5)
- Natalie Goldberg (5)
- Wayne Dyer (5)
- Brendon Burchard (4)
- Brian Tracy (4)
- don Miguel Ruiz (4)
- Eric Maisel (4)
- Harriet Lerner (4)
- Martin Luther King Jr. (4)
- Maya Angelou (4)
- Oprah Winfrey (4)
- don Jose Ruiz (3)
- Eckhart Tolle (3)
- Gabor Maté (3)
- John Perry (3)
- Ken Wilber (3)
- Rick Hanson (3)
- Robert Firestone (3)
- Sharon Strand Ellison (3)
- Terri Cole (3)
- The Dalai Lama (3)
- Alain de Botton (2)
- Alan Watts (2)
- Amishi Jha (2)
- Blaise Aguirre (2)
- Bruce Lipton (2)
- Daniel Goleman (2)
- Daniel J. Siegel (2)
- Debbie Ford (2)
- Gangaji (2)
- Gary Zukav (2)
- Gaylon Ferguson (2)
- Jay Shetty (2)
- Joe Dispenza (2)
- John C. Parkin (2)
- John Sarno (2)
- Karla McLaren (2)
- Kelly McGonigal (2)
- Lorin Roche (2)
- Marcus Aurelius (2)
- Mark Nepo (2)
- Neil Pasricha (2)
- Saeed Jones (2)
- Tony Robbins (2)
- Yung Pueblo (2)
- Alexandra Elle (1)
- Andrew Weil (1)
- Angela Duckworth (1)
- Bessel van der Kolk (1)
- Biet Simkin (1)
- Brené Brown (1)
- Chalene Johnson (1)
- Chan Khong (1)
- Chip Conley (1)
- Clarissa Pinkola Estés (1)
- Connie Zweig (1)
- David Feinstein (1)
- David J. Wolpe (1)
- Diane Ackerman (1)
- don Miguel Ruiz Jr. (1)
- Dorothy Day (1)
- Elaine Aron (1)
- Elizabeth Gilbert (1)
- Elizabeth Lesser (1)
- Epictetus (1)
- Esther Perel (1)
- Gay Hendricks (1)
- Gerald Jampolsky (1)
- Gordon Neufeld (1)
- Gretchen Rubin (1)
- Harville Hendrix (1)
- HeatherAsh Amara (1)
- Helen LaKelly Hunt (1)
- Hyla Cass (1)
- Iskra Lawrence (1)
- Iyanla Vanzant (1)
- Jack Kornfield (1)
- James Doty (1)
- James Hillman (1)
- James Hollis (1)
- Jan Willis (1)
- Jana Long (1)
- Jane Hirshfield (1)
- Jean Houston (1)
- Jeff Brown (1)
- Jesus (1)
- Jonathan Haidt (1)
- Joseph M. Marshall III (1)
- Judith Blackstone (1)
- Judith Orloff (1)
- Judson Brewer (1)
- Karen May (1)
- Kenneth Robinson (1)
- Kristin Neff (1)
- Lama Tsultrim Allione (1)
- Leah Guy (1)
- Lindo Bacon (1)
- Lise Van Susteren (1)
- Lodro Rinzler (1)
- Lori Gottlieb (1)
- Luisah Teish (1)
- Martha Beck (1)
- Martin Seligman (1)
- Matt Kahn (1)
- Mel Robbins (1)
- Michael A. Singer (1)
- Michele Borba (1)
- Mihály Csíkszentmihályi (1)
- Nicole LePera (1)
- Noah Elkrief (1)
- Paramahansa Yogananda (1)
- Patanjali (1)
- Paul Gilbert (1)
- Pema Chödrön (1)
- Philip Goldberg (1)
- Piero Ferrucci (1)
- Poppy Jamie (1)
- Ralph De La Rosa (1)
- Ralph Waldo Emerson (1)
- Ramani Durvasula (1)
- Richard Schwartz (1)
- Robert Augustus Masters (1)
- Robert Bly (1)
- Roxane Gay (1)
- Ruby Wax (1)
- Rudolph Ballentine (1)
- Rumi (1)
- Sandra Ingerman (1)
- Scott Edelstein (1)
- Shakti Gawain (1)
- Sonia Choquette (1)
- Spring Washam (1)
- Stanley Krippner (1)
- Stephanie Y. Evans (1)
- Stephen Cope (1)
- Stephen Covey (1)
- Stephen Harrod Buhner (1)
- Steven Kotler (1)
- Tara Brach (1)
- Tara Mohr (1)
- Thich Nhat Hanh (1)
- Thomas Moore (1)
- Toni Morrison (1)
- Tony Gaskins Jr. (1)
- William Bloom (1)
- Wim Hof (1)
- Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche (1)
1