Our cultural narrative is that our families are our primary sources of support, security, and love. Unfortunately, many of us don’t have that experience. Sometimes, members of our family actively reject us or part of who we are, withholding physical, emotional, or financial support unless we behave in the way they want. We hide or mask pieces of ourselves in order to be accepted by the ones—we are told—who love us the most. If we start insisting on being ourselves or enforcing boundaries against abusive or disrespectful behavior, we can be the ones accused of rejecting them. This is an incredibly painful process that can be made worse by those who feel that it is more important to maintain the image of a happy cohesive family than to be respected and have our needs met. We each have our own boundaries to negotiate and decisions to make about how far we’re willing to go to have our families accept us for who we are.
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