By Yoni Freedhoff — 2014
Blame and shame will not lead to sustainable weight loss.
Read on health.usnews.com
CLEAR ALL
Stop making food such a big thing. If you’ve lost your job and your girlfriend’s dumped you, then have a frickin’ chocolate bar. In fact, get a cab down to the nearest candy factory and do the tour where you can scoop up fistfuls and stuff them into your mouth. You’ll feel better.
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Sheila Rubin writes about transformance, a term used to describe “the force in the psyche that’s moving towards growth and expansion and transformation,” and the idea that healing is “not just an outcome but a process that exists within each person that emerges in conditions of safety.”
There’s an expectation of what is supposed to happen during the holidays: images of a family gathered around a tree, presents, food, love and connection as people smile at each other. But if your family is different, there sometimes can be shame.
One of the hardest aspects of being human is moving past shame. Those feelings of deep regret—and the lingering insecurity and unworthiness that most likely accompany them—stick with us in a way that can be profound.
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Many equate self-discipline with living a good, moral life, which ends up creating a lot of shame when we fail. There’s a better way to build lasting, solid self-discipline in your life.