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How do we find peaceful solutions when we are in conflict with others at work, school, home, or in the community? The first step is naming and defining the conflict—free from moral or value judgments—so that everyone can start on the same page, which itself can take some skilled and compassionate listening. Discovering what it is each party truly wants is the key to all negotiating, which can be difficult when even those involved may not be able to clearly state the true source of conflict, or even the desired solution. Good listening, a positive attitude, honesty, letting go of fear, kindness, mindfulness, and general acknowledgment of each side’s position helps create space for a resolution that benefits everyone.
It seems to me that the less I fight my fear, the less it fights back. If I can relax, fear relaxes, too.
